I spar with ignorance

Here I am at the service club. For the sake of information I've decided to post the transcripts and correct bad information. The names have been changed to protect identity, although the guilty know who they are.

Lola: Who is going to code the website?
Bhaha: not sure.... lol :P
Marge: lol
Beelzebub: Code?
Beelzebub: I voulenteer.
Beelzebub: Because of my quantum immortality thing... dying is not an issue
Generally I view programming ability as a better test of ability than quantum immortality, but I'm sure the guy at the job interview will hold the opposite view.
Lola: I didn't know you knew how to code!
He surprised me too!
Marge: We have a few in this club alone.
Beelzebub: I have a Java compiler
Me: *cough*
Me: *coughcough*
Please note, I do have a semi cold, so this wasn't completely a ducky thing for me to do.
Beelzebub: yes
Beelzebub: We know
Marge: have a cough drop matt
Marge: ~hands matt a cough drop~
Me: ~takes it~
Me: ~continues coughing anyways~
Now it is.
Lola: Well I knew you coded Matt
, but I thought you might have a lot of coding that you were doing.
...
Beelzebub: Question: Did I or did I not sign up for the video/ad thing?
Beelzebub: I think I did last week
Beelzebub: we extended the meeting somewhat
Bolalol: I think so, but if you could still reply to my mass email that would be great. (just so I can keep track)
Beelzebub: Just... lets keep the administrative stuff to the largest minimum possible
Beelzebub: :)
Ah yes, can't do basic tasks like email. It must be bureaucracy keeping the man down!
Beelzebub: It takes so much time.
Me: Nice oxymoron
Let's keep oxymorons to the largest minimum?
Beelzebub: Well, let us keep it to a minimum
...
Beelzebub: You automatically get a banhammer
Beelzebub: I posted the first group
Beelzebub: You mean, Newspaper
Beelzebub: as well
Beelzebub: It may not work at all
Beelzebub: Do it yourself if you want it to operate properly
Beelzebub: WARG
Beelzebub: :)
He keeps saying this "Do it yourself if you want it to operate properly", which makes me wonder, is he some sort of do it himself god or does he just have very low expectations?
...
Beelzebub: If you want it done properly, do it yourself
Beelzebub: LOOK GUYS
Beelzebub: I AM JUST ABOUT TO ELABORATE
Bolalol: How exactly are we going to get the speaker into centra?
Beelzebub: Huh
Me: Too bad hosting comes out to about $10 a month
Sandra: only 20?
Sandra: that's great!
Beelzebub: About 5 starbucks coffees
Beelzebub: I mean, 4
Me: No, that's just for the domain name...
Beelzebub: Yes
Beelzebub: But the space can be from Stanford
Beelzebub: :)
Beelzebub: ;)
Beelzebub: Or Google, etc.
Me: If they let us... remember Emily was paying for the yearbook herself
The difference between buying a domain and hosting a website is apparently very difficult to grasp unless you've run a server on your old Pentium III.
...
Marge: but is that the same as a google page?
Beelzebub: Yeag
Me: Googlepages != google groups :P
Beelzebub: It should be private
Beelzebub: But we can have a public extension
I've never heard of a private extension on a website, but then I've only been using the internet for seven years.
Lola: Matt, do you know how much it'd be (cost wise) for our own website?
Me: $10 for a domain, and then $6.75 monthly
That dampened enthusiasm a bit.
Me: You don't write webpages in Java
Beelzebub: I am doing java
Beelzebub: note that I have not done C++ so I am at an advantage
You've never done a very similar object orientated language, so you are at an advantage? An advantage against who? I've been taking Java for three years now.
Me: Yeah... and webpages aren't written in it
Beelzebub: Actually, that is what Java is for :)

Me: Actually that is what HTML is for
Ask anyone. Webpages are written in HTML. Extra prettiness is done with CSS. Extra bandwidth wastage is done with Flash. Extra scripting is done with Java Script. Extra applets are done with Java or Flash.
Beelzebub: I am tired of unstable webpages.
Beelzebub: that crash 100 times a second and you can do nothing about it
For instance? I can't think of any off the of my head. Maybe he was thinking of downloadnudewomenandspyware.com, in which case it certainly isn't the fault of HTML. The implausibility of website doing that is also mind boggling.
Me: You know you can't even load Java applets without HTML right?
Beelzebub: e.g. Some new mail servers
Some mail servers? I suppose I could see HotMail doing that. Serves anyone who uses HotMail right for using it over GMail.
Me: And that website crashes are due to JavaScript/Flash/and other imbedded stuff?
I cut out a long portion where I asked him basic question about the internet, all of which were not answered correctly.
Beelzebub: you can do an MS word to html or Notepad to html
Beelzebub: IE sucks
I can tell you this much. Writing html in either of those programs is like getting a thousand flu shots in your left eyeball. It sucks, and it isn't effective, and you website (eye in this analogy) will end up looking like crap. I'm going to ignore his slightly redeeming comment about IE, since everyone already knows it.
...
Beelzebub: I use Netscape
Me: That explains a lot...
Beelzebub: What?
Me: Firefox :P
Beelzebub: Actually, Netscape uses Internet Explorer systems better than Internet Explorer
It's true IE was based off of Netscape, but this neither means his claim is true nor does it matter.
Marge: Firefox pwns. (yes, pwns.)
Marge: 1, Manchester U: 0.
Beelzebub: It also has Firefox support, which is good as an extension
He has it backwards. Firefox has support for Netscape extensions, which further removes any reason to use NetScape.
Beelzebub: Netscape PWNS
Beelzebub: Actually, it wins
...
Beelzebub: Actually
Beelzebub: Matt
Beelzebub: html crashes were on IE
Beelzebub: not Netscape
...
Beelzebub: My version of netscape is mostly new (version 8)
Beelzebub: It runs smoothly
Me: Then what are you complaining abou tBeelzebub?
Beelzebub: Well, it was a C++ thing
OH! It must have been a webpage written in C++ that crashed your computer! Certainly! Seriously though, trying to display a C++ file as a webpage probably would crash your computer.
Me: You said there were webpages that crashed.
Beelzebub: oh
Beelzebub: I cannot remember
Beelzebub: I am overdosed on caffiene
Beelzebub: (not)
It's obviously because the name of the website is too embarrassing to reveal in public. (see above)
Beelzebub: wwaaiitt... aamm II??
Beelzebub: NOT IF YOU GET IT FROM WIKIPEDIA
Beelzebub: OR UNCYCLOPEDIA
Using caps is oddly satisfying, isn't it? NOT REALLY.
Sandra: Microsoft, root of all evil!
Sandra: I could raid his house :P
Beelzebub: Copyright infringement was invented in 1870 for teenagers who had run out of household cleaning products to inhale
Sandra: it's not too far from me
Beelzebub: Just copyleft it
Lola: heheh, Ty ;)
Sandra: laws? abide?
Beelzebub: or copyup it
Sandra: what?
...
Beelzebub: or copydown it
Marge: copy it down?
...
Beelzebub: copydown: People in the past are not allowed to do it
...
Matthew's spokesperson said he declined to comment.
Beelzebub: but people in the future are
...
Beelzebub: Or just do GNU copyright
...
Beelzebub: which means use it for your own sick pleasures
It's the GNU license not copy right. Learn some basic lingo before trying to talk about laws.

Great. Now I'm cranky. More content coming later this evening.